Finding the basic goodness... [of ourselves and others] is like that- tapping into a spring of living water that has been temporarily encased in solid rock. When we touch the center of sorrow, when we sit with discomfort without trying to fix it, when we stay present to the pain of disapproval or betrayal and let it soften us, these are the times that we connect...
- Pema Chodron
This opening is just so important to me. a rush.
I had this feeling not long ago. I am aware that if I talk about it now, I might have it again :-) - and that does scare me a bit :-). I suppose this is the hope for all the time - that we could really be here, and let go of the ways that keep us separate from what's really going on.
Another image that comes to me is of someone else, when you watch, you watch them crack open. Slowly, softly, truly, willingly. I'm thinking of someone who I had felt somewhat separate from before, who felt connected to me, and decided to open. Being part of this opening is probably the most beautiful thing I am privileged to experience.
I was tapped not long ago when my supervisor asked me about how I was feeling about my job. She asked if I was feeling more nervousness or anxiety than excitement - and the truth was "Yes." It was a relief. It was a huge relief. I was so grateful she asked. We sifted down together, without even having to say much of anything. And then I could finally talk.
The ability to do this is so important as a facilitator, or a leader of any kind. Whew! (appreciative whistling sound). As a facilitator, I often bring the agenda to be liked. Also, of course, to succeed in the goal of the program. The first agenda is not truly necessary, and the second doesn't always materialize. When this happens, it's a total trigger for me. If the goals of the program don't seem to be being met, or if someone doesn't feel that they are being met - "being with it" is in fact the most important thing I can do. (Perhaps supplemented by some mantra like, "Wow! This is interesting. I'm just SO curious! :-P) As a facilitator trainer asked over and over during a training, "What is happening?" In the words of J. Krishnamurti, "Observation without evaluation is the highest form of human intelligence." Observation also means getting input - and trying to separate facts from evaluations there. {appreciative whistle.......!} again
This, the lifetime practice, seems to be the hardest thing to do. I figure out all kinds of ways not to do it. In fact, I'm often ashamed of my inability to do it...
So I'll suppose I should sit with that for awhile. ;-)
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